1
Air was mildly chilly and it coupled with a feeling of death made my body ice cold. The mild perfume from the girl sitting next to me couldn't add a tiny bit of life to it. But then a swift wind germinated a tear in my left eye. It slowly collected the bits of sorrows that were scattered in my mind and grew large enough to drop down to my lap. The body shuddered as warmth returned to it.
2
I sniffed at the air, what was that smell, was it a psychoactive drug?, my eyes were hit by the red neon lights, my head rocked from side to side from the broken road, is this air drugged?, the bumps were hitting my head again, I remembered the unmatched giant breasts of a dead woman on the screen, I told her not to lift her top again, can i have some more of the hallucinogenic drug?, the green and red lights hit the eyes again, the piercing voice in my ear is changing speed, direction, techno beats, when did i start liking them, I saw the hot woman in red sari swinging her head in wild abandon, I am getting out of the trance, give me another dose.
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Waiting Room
He sat quietly on the chair besides the receptionist's window. He was out of the receptionist's point of view. When her fine Anglican tones invoked his foreign native name, it did not register. He continued to stare past the window at the trees dead in the thawing snow.
After a second failed attempt at calling him, the receptionist leans over the window and looks him dead in the eye and says with a genuine smile "The doctor will see you now". He snaps out of his reverie and walks towards the doctor's office. The memory of her smile kicks in to remind him that he hadn't smiled back. Rather belatedly he smiles at the fire extinguisher by the door as he steps in, immediately realizing the futility of the gesture.
The doctor checks his pulse, looks in his mouth, checks his lungs and reads his pressure. Finally snapping off her gloves, she says "For someone your age, your blood pressure is high. Try to cut down on your caffeine intake."
He mutters something about decaf or something. The doctor goes on uninterrupted "See me again in 3 months time That should tell us if the blood pressure reading is one off or if its symptomatic."
He takes her leave and remembers to smile and wish her a good day, almost as if making up for not smiling back to the receptionist. But the doctor has already started looking into her X-ray for the next patient and mutters a vague acknowledgment.
Vaguely underwhelmed, he walks back to the hallway hoping to find the receptionist and flash a big smile. She is not there. She is out back smoking sweet death. He sighs and walks out into the cold and wonders if its colder inside or here by his car as flurries spun around his ears.
He steps inside and drives away as 106.9 WCCC blared "Loud Love" by SoundGarden...
After a second failed attempt at calling him, the receptionist leans over the window and looks him dead in the eye and says with a genuine smile "The doctor will see you now". He snaps out of his reverie and walks towards the doctor's office. The memory of her smile kicks in to remind him that he hadn't smiled back. Rather belatedly he smiles at the fire extinguisher by the door as he steps in, immediately realizing the futility of the gesture.
The doctor checks his pulse, looks in his mouth, checks his lungs and reads his pressure. Finally snapping off her gloves, she says "For someone your age, your blood pressure is high. Try to cut down on your caffeine intake."
He mutters something about decaf or something. The doctor goes on uninterrupted "See me again in 3 months time That should tell us if the blood pressure reading is one off or if its symptomatic."
He takes her leave and remembers to smile and wish her a good day, almost as if making up for not smiling back to the receptionist. But the doctor has already started looking into her X-ray for the next patient and mutters a vague acknowledgment.
Vaguely underwhelmed, he walks back to the hallway hoping to find the receptionist and flash a big smile. She is not there. She is out back smoking sweet death. He sighs and walks out into the cold and wonders if its colder inside or here by his car as flurries spun around his ears.
He steps inside and drives away as 106.9 WCCC blared "Loud Love" by SoundGarden...
Friday, February 13, 2009
Day
I was reminded of this post made in a different time and place by a kindred spirit. I outright copied him for this. So no claims of originality here...
Day is the about the time between sunrise and sunset.
Its when melatonin is suppressed and most primal emotions are repressed.
Its when you are supposed to be awake and you are not.
Day is about work, spilt milk and quick cuts and dissolves.
Day is about fluorescent lights, attention disorders and more...
Day is a Trojan that escapes the nightly virus scan and is the wreaking havoc on your imagination's filesystem.
But since imagination too is a sentient concept within the Matrix, it also somehow escapes the scan. There is really no need for another virus to combat it...
Day as in Slay is the beating of dead imagination's horses.
Day is, the incessant background conversations that drones over the soundtrack of your brain.
Tight close-ups, in fact are the only things missing from Day - that makes it stop short of a daytime soap opera.
Day is your irrational attempt to subdue your thoughts from the night before...
Day is also the boundary of not just light and darkness...
but also the boundary inside defining emotion and action...
Day is about Dissociative Identity Disorder about how your dreams of what you ought to be
Rises in direct conflict with the reality of what you have become
Day is a game of chess...maneouvers and counter-maneouvers...stabs and back-stabs
Day is a concept that I have shunned for a long time...
Day is the result of our lost nights...
Day is the reason, that I am typing all this when I should have been writing functional requirements.
I may be wrong, but if you are anything like who I am, you are putting off work reading this too...
Day is when the train of thought runs on multiple parallel tracks and sometimes on collision courses...
The cold waves of air blitzing through the air conditioner pulverizes the brain to super-conductivity and the trains run amok.
Day is the reason, I dread waking up, because it makes life a chore.
Day is where the questions come up?
I cannot tell you what my day is like...You have to endure it for yourself.
For some of us day doesn't exist, we sleepwalk alone in crowds before waking up in our sleep.
Day is the reason, I refuse to think about my life,
even if I can't stop myself and fatigue by just keeping these thoughts away.
if I were to say , "dont think about her and..." slip into this...
"If we submit this PCR document by noon today, will the stakeholders provide timely approval?"
Did you just hit your mailbox to see if you have any emails requiring your approval? Or did you not care like me?
Day is your prison, where you will be held against your wish until night.
You have the right to remain silent and anything you say will be used against you in a court of flaw.
Day is your reminder that you are in this alone.
Day is what you do to get to Night.
This exposition on Day is quite frankly boring.
Today is however the one day that I am thinking about Day.
Day is when you fall to the ground with burnt wings from flying too close to the sun.
Day is when the moth with burnt wings is no better than the ant without any...
Day is the curse for many.
Day is about looking at that pretty girl in the cafeteria, catching her eye, then thinking involuntary dirty thoughts before shuddering in distaste.
Day is about existence justification, memory of a simpler times and looking back at embers of bridges glowing behind us (to a dream of how green it was on the other side)
Day is about forgetting friends, ideas, imagination and remembering painful things from your past.
Day is about maximizing opportunities and leveraging angles.
Day is not new.
Day is always a struggle. Once infected by it, you will never be cured.
Day is when you realize the ugly moth that stepped out as a beautiful butterfly still shits the same crap as it did before.
Day is when we think of excuses for another day.
Day is how I spend waiting for Night.
Day is about looking forward to your new dreams...
while also mourning the death of your old dreams.
Day is about abstract psycho-babble,
MS Excel, Word, Office and Outlook.
Day is about coffee breaks, saying "Hi. This is Bala" and putting yourself on mute for the rest of the meeting.
Day is about being cattle herded through life with the occasional paranoid delusion of being creative
And finally, Day has no finality and it always merges imperceptibly into Night.
Day does not lead us into Night on a timetable set by light...
Day is the dread that the Night, however sweet, will not be long...
Day is the about the time between sunrise and sunset.
Its when melatonin is suppressed and most primal emotions are repressed.
Its when you are supposed to be awake and you are not.
Day is about work, spilt milk and quick cuts and dissolves.
Day is about fluorescent lights, attention disorders and more...
Day is a Trojan that escapes the nightly virus scan and is the wreaking havoc on your imagination's filesystem.
But since imagination too is a sentient concept within the Matrix, it also somehow escapes the scan. There is really no need for another virus to combat it...
Day as in Slay is the beating of dead imagination's horses.
Day is, the incessant background conversations that drones over the soundtrack of your brain.
Tight close-ups, in fact are the only things missing from Day - that makes it stop short of a daytime soap opera.
Day is your irrational attempt to subdue your thoughts from the night before...
Day is also the boundary of not just light and darkness...
but also the boundary inside defining emotion and action...
Day is about Dissociative Identity Disorder about how your dreams of what you ought to be
Rises in direct conflict with the reality of what you have become
Day is a game of chess...maneouvers and counter-maneouvers...stabs and back-stabs
Day is a concept that I have shunned for a long time...
Day is the result of our lost nights...
Day is the reason, that I am typing all this when I should have been writing functional requirements.
I may be wrong, but if you are anything like who I am, you are putting off work reading this too...
Day is when the train of thought runs on multiple parallel tracks and sometimes on collision courses...
The cold waves of air blitzing through the air conditioner pulverizes the brain to super-conductivity and the trains run amok.
Day is the reason, I dread waking up, because it makes life a chore.
Day is where the questions come up?
I cannot tell you what my day is like...You have to endure it for yourself.
For some of us day doesn't exist, we sleepwalk alone in crowds before waking up in our sleep.
Day is the reason, I refuse to think about my life,
even if I can't stop myself and fatigue by just keeping these thoughts away.
if I were to say , "dont think about her and..." slip into this...
"If we submit this PCR document by noon today, will the stakeholders provide timely approval?"
Did you just hit your mailbox to see if you have any emails requiring your approval? Or did you not care like me?
Day is your prison, where you will be held against your wish until night.
You have the right to remain silent and anything you say will be used against you in a court of flaw.
Day is your reminder that you are in this alone.
Day is what you do to get to Night.
This exposition on Day is quite frankly boring.
Today is however the one day that I am thinking about Day.
Day is when you fall to the ground with burnt wings from flying too close to the sun.
Day is when the moth with burnt wings is no better than the ant without any...
Day is the curse for many.
Day is about looking at that pretty girl in the cafeteria, catching her eye, then thinking involuntary dirty thoughts before shuddering in distaste.
Day is about existence justification, memory of a simpler times and looking back at embers of bridges glowing behind us (to a dream of how green it was on the other side)
Day is about forgetting friends, ideas, imagination and remembering painful things from your past.
Day is about maximizing opportunities and leveraging angles.
Day is not new.
Day is always a struggle. Once infected by it, you will never be cured.
Day is when you realize the ugly moth that stepped out as a beautiful butterfly still shits the same crap as it did before.
Day is when we think of excuses for another day.
Day is how I spend waiting for Night.
Day is about looking forward to your new dreams...
while also mourning the death of your old dreams.
Day is about abstract psycho-babble,
MS Excel, Word, Office and Outlook.
Day is about coffee breaks, saying "Hi. This is Bala" and putting yourself on mute for the rest of the meeting.
Day is about being cattle herded through life with the occasional paranoid delusion of being creative
And finally, Day has no finality and it always merges imperceptibly into Night.
Day does not lead us into Night on a timetable set by light...
Day is the dread that the Night, however sweet, will not be long...
Non-Sequitur
"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot?
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
Each prayer accepted and each wish resigned."
Happy Valentine's Day...Watch this great movie with a loved one...and fall in love with life again...
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.
Each prayer accepted and each wish resigned."
Happy Valentine's Day...Watch this great movie with a loved one...and fall in love with life again...
Homecoming
post oh-one for year oh-nine...
haven't been blogging for a while since i have been taking to heart something a friend of mine once asked, "u write when u are all cranky...u never write nice things"...
so i figured i will wait until i find something nice to write about for once. the counter-argument was always on that if i did write something nice, it probably would not be true.
counter-counter-argument now is that no body really cares if i write cranky stuff or not...at least not the readers of this blog (who can be counted on the fingers of a man with a hand that is missing some fingers...)
intellectual arguments soon devolve to ineffectual arguments for me. so i will not counter the counter-counter one...(hey you coders out there, does blogger have a counter that validates the counts of my args? don't get upset all u syntax and code gurus...its just me blabbering again!)
so yeah...having rambled on a good while...lemme see if i can somehow reach the meat of what i am trying to say...
of late life has been boring to a horrifying degree...life had nothing to look forward to...nothing to look back and reminisce nostalgically (not entirely true since the past is always beautiful even if it was every bit as ugly then as the present is now...rose tinted one way glasses if you can call it that)...
so here i sit with seven novels that i intend to read (actually have begun three and suspended them animatedly)...
also am idling with two dvds from netflix as yet unseen and thrity-two more in queue...not to forget the nine that are on instant queue (again begun three and suspended animatedly)
i look at my collection of nearly five thousand six hundred songs every now and then and listen to one, two or three songs at a time that grab my fancy...
music is the one place i have found something to interest me these days. having discovered on online radio station thanks to my buddy who sent me the link, i have been discovering music and i am seeing a lot of links between bands, i read them up on wikipedia, vicariously live out their lives and listen to their songs as they occurred in points of their lives. its heady at times...
one of the direct consequences of the slacker revolution has been my immersion into grunge, alternative metal, speed metal, thrash metal and death metal in that approximate order.
so in what is the first of, something i hope to be my series of posts over the next uncertain days, months or (hopefully not) years, is my discussion to myself about grunge.
grunge/alternative metal are used interchangeably and mostly point to the sound of the seattle four who began it in the late 80s to the early 90s. before getting into the details of the seattle four (i came up with this imaginative term...the wiki-able term would probably be seattle sound), lets look at what led to the grunge movement in music.
the late 70s to early 80s of contemporary music devolved into glam rock and glam metal bands who were more concerned with their make-up eye-shadow and glitter than a modern day katy perry/britney spears...and these are men we are talking about...and the less that is said about their lyrical content the better...glorified by such masterpieces as "iiiiii...wanna rock n roll all night.....paaarty every dayyyy" over and over about 100 times in a 4 minute song overloaded with six guitars, a heavy drum kit, two to three vocalists and an insufferable keyboard player (personally no metal band should ever have a keyboard player no matter how cool avial sounds...)
needless to say some people had enough of these preening corporate puppets who churned out mindless album after album. the mid 80s saw the rise of a seattle based band known as soundgarden with a radically distorted guitar played by kim thayil (yep expat mallu in the works...) and furious four octave vocalist chris cornell. soundgarden had several abstract songs and music arrangements that had not been heard of back in the day and the fans who were looking for an iota of feeling in their music gravitated towards this seattle sound.
soundgarden lay a platform upon which a phenomenal new band stood and shone brighter than any other...nirvana...led by a tragic hero in the lines of jim morrison of the doors, kurt cobain was the god of grunge. his strangled vocals trapped the angst of a generation as he sang about love and loss. to this day i get goosebumps when i hear his voice on the radio.
close on the heels of nirvana followed anothe seattle band pearl jam with eddie vedder providing his own howling crazy vocals to back his angst ridden lyrics. there was even a trash talking war were kurt dismissed eddie and jam as being grunge rip-offs feeding of the nirvana success.
pearl jam however has remained alive for the longest and is the one band that still has potential to churn out an album in this century.
the last of the seattle four to burst on the music scene was alice in chains...and to my uninformed mind, this band shone brightest and for the shortest time. led by another lovely singer layne staley, the trauma of their songs is fresh to anyone who has felt alive and thus has felt pain at some time in their lives...
its of layne and curt that i will speak the most here simply because i wiki'd them the most and they are the only ones who are dead now...eddie and chris continue to make music in some form or shape to this day...even if soundgarden is long defunct and pearl jam is almost irrelevant...
both layne and kurt were born in sixty-seven, with kurt being the older. both had troubled childhoods with separated parents and traumatized school lives...both spiraled into drug addictions that played its part in their demise...both were uncomfortable in their own celebrity which may or may not have driven them deeper into their addictions...kurt blew his brains out on april fifth ninteen-ninety-four at a scary young age of twenty-seven...layne dropped out of limelight and public sight soon after kurt's death and eight years to the day, was found in his apartment dead from an overdose of cocaine and heroin on april fifth two-thousand-two...
eerie similarities apart, to me layne's addiction and devolution was more painful to even read about since the man clearly understood what it was doing to him and was powerless to stop it...whereas kurt seems to have depended on his addiction to release his pain from the real world.
its easy to dismiss both people as having taken the easy way out and not faced life. and we can even take some pride in ourselves not resorting to any debilitating addictions to handle our own messed up lives...but i feel we ought to acknowledge their struggle and take some inspiration from their pain and handle ourselves in the best way we can which does not hurt us or the ones we care about....friends, family and well wishers...
if i am not really making much sense, just go on and listen to a few songs by nirvana and alice in chains...make up your own mind about how you feel about them...and how you feel about me...
for now i am just soaking in music as i let life glide along its unhindered path...
nirvana - come as you are
nirvana - the man who sold the world
nirvana - where did you sleep last night
nirvana - all apologies
nirvana - basically grab the mtv unplugged album for nirvana...solid gold
alice in chains - rotten apple
alice in chains - nutshell (my personal favourite...very dear to me)
alice in chains - man in the box
alice in chains - angry chair
alice in chains - same rule as for nirvana...grab the mtv unplugged album...gold.
p.s - some of you dear readers do not like this kind of music...and that's fine....i still love you all...
haven't been blogging for a while since i have been taking to heart something a friend of mine once asked, "u write when u are all cranky...u never write nice things"...
so i figured i will wait until i find something nice to write about for once. the counter-argument was always on that if i did write something nice, it probably would not be true.
counter-counter-argument now is that no body really cares if i write cranky stuff or not...at least not the readers of this blog (who can be counted on the fingers of a man with a hand that is missing some fingers...)
intellectual arguments soon devolve to ineffectual arguments for me. so i will not counter the counter-counter one...(hey you coders out there, does blogger have a counter that validates the counts of my args? don't get upset all u syntax and code gurus...its just me blabbering again!)
so yeah...having rambled on a good while...lemme see if i can somehow reach the meat of what i am trying to say...
of late life has been boring to a horrifying degree...life had nothing to look forward to...nothing to look back and reminisce nostalgically (not entirely true since the past is always beautiful even if it was every bit as ugly then as the present is now...rose tinted one way glasses if you can call it that)...
so here i sit with seven novels that i intend to read (actually have begun three and suspended them animatedly)...
also am idling with two dvds from netflix as yet unseen and thrity-two more in queue...not to forget the nine that are on instant queue (again begun three and suspended animatedly)
i look at my collection of nearly five thousand six hundred songs every now and then and listen to one, two or three songs at a time that grab my fancy...
music is the one place i have found something to interest me these days. having discovered on online radio station thanks to my buddy who sent me the link, i have been discovering music and i am seeing a lot of links between bands, i read them up on wikipedia, vicariously live out their lives and listen to their songs as they occurred in points of their lives. its heady at times...
one of the direct consequences of the slacker revolution has been my immersion into grunge, alternative metal, speed metal, thrash metal and death metal in that approximate order.
so in what is the first of, something i hope to be my series of posts over the next uncertain days, months or (hopefully not) years, is my discussion to myself about grunge.
grunge/alternative metal are used interchangeably and mostly point to the sound of the seattle four who began it in the late 80s to the early 90s. before getting into the details of the seattle four (i came up with this imaginative term...the wiki-able term would probably be seattle sound), lets look at what led to the grunge movement in music.
the late 70s to early 80s of contemporary music devolved into glam rock and glam metal bands who were more concerned with their make-up eye-shadow and glitter than a modern day katy perry/britney spears...and these are men we are talking about...and the less that is said about their lyrical content the better...glorified by such masterpieces as "iiiiii...wanna rock n roll all night.....paaarty every dayyyy" over and over about 100 times in a 4 minute song overloaded with six guitars, a heavy drum kit, two to three vocalists and an insufferable keyboard player (personally no metal band should ever have a keyboard player no matter how cool avial sounds...)
needless to say some people had enough of these preening corporate puppets who churned out mindless album after album. the mid 80s saw the rise of a seattle based band known as soundgarden with a radically distorted guitar played by kim thayil (yep expat mallu in the works...) and furious four octave vocalist chris cornell. soundgarden had several abstract songs and music arrangements that had not been heard of back in the day and the fans who were looking for an iota of feeling in their music gravitated towards this seattle sound.
soundgarden lay a platform upon which a phenomenal new band stood and shone brighter than any other...nirvana...led by a tragic hero in the lines of jim morrison of the doors, kurt cobain was the god of grunge. his strangled vocals trapped the angst of a generation as he sang about love and loss. to this day i get goosebumps when i hear his voice on the radio.
close on the heels of nirvana followed anothe seattle band pearl jam with eddie vedder providing his own howling crazy vocals to back his angst ridden lyrics. there was even a trash talking war were kurt dismissed eddie and jam as being grunge rip-offs feeding of the nirvana success.
pearl jam however has remained alive for the longest and is the one band that still has potential to churn out an album in this century.
the last of the seattle four to burst on the music scene was alice in chains...and to my uninformed mind, this band shone brightest and for the shortest time. led by another lovely singer layne staley, the trauma of their songs is fresh to anyone who has felt alive and thus has felt pain at some time in their lives...
its of layne and curt that i will speak the most here simply because i wiki'd them the most and they are the only ones who are dead now...eddie and chris continue to make music in some form or shape to this day...even if soundgarden is long defunct and pearl jam is almost irrelevant...
both layne and kurt were born in sixty-seven, with kurt being the older. both had troubled childhoods with separated parents and traumatized school lives...both spiraled into drug addictions that played its part in their demise...both were uncomfortable in their own celebrity which may or may not have driven them deeper into their addictions...kurt blew his brains out on april fifth ninteen-ninety-four at a scary young age of twenty-seven...layne dropped out of limelight and public sight soon after kurt's death and eight years to the day, was found in his apartment dead from an overdose of cocaine and heroin on april fifth two-thousand-two...
eerie similarities apart, to me layne's addiction and devolution was more painful to even read about since the man clearly understood what it was doing to him and was powerless to stop it...whereas kurt seems to have depended on his addiction to release his pain from the real world.
its easy to dismiss both people as having taken the easy way out and not faced life. and we can even take some pride in ourselves not resorting to any debilitating addictions to handle our own messed up lives...but i feel we ought to acknowledge their struggle and take some inspiration from their pain and handle ourselves in the best way we can which does not hurt us or the ones we care about....friends, family and well wishers...
if i am not really making much sense, just go on and listen to a few songs by nirvana and alice in chains...make up your own mind about how you feel about them...and how you feel about me...
for now i am just soaking in music as i let life glide along its unhindered path...
nirvana - come as you are
nirvana - the man who sold the world
nirvana - where did you sleep last night
nirvana - all apologies
nirvana - basically grab the mtv unplugged album for nirvana...solid gold
alice in chains - rotten apple
alice in chains - nutshell (my personal favourite...very dear to me)
alice in chains - man in the box
alice in chains - angry chair
alice in chains - same rule as for nirvana...grab the mtv unplugged album...gold.
p.s - some of you dear readers do not like this kind of music...and that's fine....i still love you all...
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Reels
D1 :
cupid comes in the form of a cavalcade of trailers. g is left behind in the company of lone monkey
in the middle of the road.
g : wait guys, wait for me.
lone_monkey : hey g, it doesnt kill to spend some time with me.
g : dont stare at me, it creeps me out.
lone_monkey : can't control it.
g : lunges forward, to the small gap in the cavalcade. gets carried to D2.
l_from_D2 : l, you fuck up, what did you do to get her crazy.
D2 :
cupid comes in the form of a unbalanced feet. g loses her balance while jumping over the divider in the road,
loses her glasses. The glasses were shattered.
lone_monkey : hey g, can you see without them.
g : barely, i can see your shape only.
l : come hold my hand.
g_from_D1 emerges from between the trailers.
g_from_D1 : g, dont take his hand, hes a creep. hes a hopeless fucked up guy.
g : why do you say that.
helps her safely to the next side.
g : thanks l.
l jumps drags g_from_D1 and jumps back to D1.
D3 :
cupid is not seen and l is waiting for him. g is getting impatient waiting to cross the road.
l : hey g, do you see me.
g : doesnt hear l.
l shakes g holding her sholders.
l : i am here, in flesh and blood. cant you see me.
PS : Blogger took me here through a button called New Post. But this is an (very)old post. Don't tell him :)
cupid comes in the form of a cavalcade of trailers. g is left behind in the company of lone monkey
in the middle of the road.
g : wait guys, wait for me.
lone_monkey : hey g, it doesnt kill to spend some time with me.
g : dont stare at me, it creeps me out.
lone_monkey : can't control it.
g : lunges forward, to the small gap in the cavalcade. gets carried to D2.
l_from_D2 : l, you fuck up, what did you do to get her crazy.
D2 :
cupid comes in the form of a unbalanced feet. g loses her balance while jumping over the divider in the road,
loses her glasses. The glasses were shattered.
lone_monkey : hey g, can you see without them.
g : barely, i can see your shape only.
l : come hold my hand.
g_from_D1 emerges from between the trailers.
g_from_D1 : g, dont take his hand, hes a creep. hes a hopeless fucked up guy.
g : why do you say that.
helps her safely to the next side.
g : thanks l.
l jumps drags g_from_D1 and jumps back to D1.
D3 :
cupid is not seen and l is waiting for him. g is getting impatient waiting to cross the road.
l : hey g, do you see me.
g : doesnt hear l.
l shakes g holding her sholders.
l : i am here, in flesh and blood. cant you see me.
PS : Blogger took me here through a button called New Post. But this is an (very)old post. Don't tell him :)
Friday, December 05, 2008
Observations of a 5-day gym n00b
It has been a while since I made any decent, relevant update on this little corner. Not that there was a dearth of material to write about and get off my chest. More that such exercises have harmed others more than they have helped me in the past. So I bite back on the impulse for any more soul searching and stick to these "observations", if I might call them that.
An ever expanding waist line and the crushing desperation of not doing anything worthwhile with my life has led me to decide that about an hour manipulating unfriendly equipment inside an air-conditioned room is the way to go about things.
Its been 5 days since I began on this little gig. I mostly do Aerobics only, concentrating almost exclusively on the Elliptical Trainer which is like a treadmill and an exercycle rolled into one. For someone of my size and weakness in the knees, this is probably the best option that will help burn some weight off without busting a kneecap.
I average about 30 minutes a day on the trot and about 3.3 miles at a time. Not bad considering that I am going from 0 minutes a day and about 0 miles at a time.
What have I learnt in these 5 days? For someone who has nothing and no one to care about and take care of, this is the one tiny opportunity to take care of myself. If only for 30 minutes at a time.
However the nihilistic streak in me does not acknowledge this as being something good for myself. I look at them as 30 minute exercises of self destruction and more importantly the subsequent reward of salvation and redemption. Fleeting as it feels, its worth it when you get there.
The French have a poetic choice of words when describing an orgasm. They call it "La Petit Mort" or The Little Death. Without any associated weird sexual imagery let me just say that this comes close.
Having seen this and felt that, I believe its important to push yourself a little bit more and little bit harder the next time because, even as cliched as it sounds, that which doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. As a newbie I am calling out to a veteran to share his experiences. "Phobos" I am talking to you...
An ever expanding waist line and the crushing desperation of not doing anything worthwhile with my life has led me to decide that about an hour manipulating unfriendly equipment inside an air-conditioned room is the way to go about things.
Its been 5 days since I began on this little gig. I mostly do Aerobics only, concentrating almost exclusively on the Elliptical Trainer which is like a treadmill and an exercycle rolled into one. For someone of my size and weakness in the knees, this is probably the best option that will help burn some weight off without busting a kneecap.
I average about 30 minutes a day on the trot and about 3.3 miles at a time. Not bad considering that I am going from 0 minutes a day and about 0 miles at a time.
What have I learnt in these 5 days? For someone who has nothing and no one to care about and take care of, this is the one tiny opportunity to take care of myself. If only for 30 minutes at a time.
However the nihilistic streak in me does not acknowledge this as being something good for myself. I look at them as 30 minute exercises of self destruction and more importantly the subsequent reward of salvation and redemption. Fleeting as it feels, its worth it when you get there.
The French have a poetic choice of words when describing an orgasm. They call it "La Petit Mort" or The Little Death. Without any associated weird sexual imagery let me just say that this comes close.
Having seen this and felt that, I believe its important to push yourself a little bit more and little bit harder the next time because, even as cliched as it sounds, that which doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. As a newbie I am calling out to a veteran to share his experiences. "Phobos" I am talking to you...
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Swaraj Road - The Freedom Circle
Crib Season - Episode 4
6.30 in the morning. The silver alto looks like a bullet on the relatively free kunnamkulam - thrissur NH47. 80 km/hr, not bad. I've got an appointment with the doctor. Need to rush! There is a gentle fog, which adds to the eerie early morning experience. Double strong Red Label Tea is what keeps me awake. Out of nowhere, an autorickshaw appears on the wrong side, circles on the middle, breaks, moves forward, breaks again... confused driver? drunken driver? out of control? I dont know. Nevertheles, the universe decided to say "NO" to my best efforts to keep away from him. Thud!( Initial Contact), Chlimblimbilim! (Mirrors), Plop! Spfeeeee (Tyres)
My left fender crumpled and dug a dent into the giant (this was not a normal auto, looked like a tractor with autorickshaws bodywork) autorickshaw's rear, left door jammed, mirror lay scattered, plastics reins holding the engine to the body broke, left tyre punctured, front seat passenger aghast, mud flaps twisted and choked... I came to a punctured halt. The road is still quiet. We parked the car immediately and hopped on to the next bus. The Doctor's appointment is too precious to be lost for the petty thousands we could get from the poor auto driver. On his side, half a day's paint and dent work would do fine.
Why ?
Dividers: There are no dividers. So, cyclists, human beings, dogs, cats, cars or anything mobile can CROSS the road anywhere! You need to be extra alert for the ... CROSSINGS (aargh!) crossings happen left to right, right to left, middle to left, left to middle, middle to right, right to middle, at an angle, may take a parabolic path, may suddenly stop , think and then move forward OR may stop , think and turn a U-Turn to go back to where they started. In short, the possibilities are immense... the best you can do is "SOUND HORN OK PLEASE". Which means, use horn no less than once every 10 seconds, announcing your arrival. Cyclists and human beings dont have REAR VIEW MIRRORS, Autos, Cars and Buses dont use them. So, no-one is bothered about the main road user's priviliges, when he or she enters from a pocket road. The rule is "DIVE STRAIGHT IN.. GOD will SAVE US". No driving school teaches you to use mirrors.
Road Width: The breadth of the road varies from 3 feet to 13 feet. Turn a quick turn on a super highway, and dont be surprised to find a BRIDGE where only ONE vehicle can pass at a time! So, if you grew accustomed to say moderatly wide roads for about 30 minutes and decide to Overtake... hold your horses, you dont know what lies ahead! Caution: This width is not guaranteed ahead. Lets take a normal National Highway, NH47 in kerala. Average Width of the road: 13 feet.Width of 1 Tata Bus: 6.4 feet. So, if two buses are moving in the opposite direction, they have 6 centimetres distance, between them. And the buses routinely do 80-90 km/hr. Wait a minute! Are buses the only vehicles ? The smallest car (alto) has a width of 4.8 feet, so cannot pass through the 6 centimetre gap. If the bus ahead stops for something, all vehicles behind stop. There are no footpaths, so human beings and cyclists sometimes occupy 1-2 feet. Motorbikes take 3 feet or drive in the middle. Which means, there is no choice but to Overtake!
Overtaking: The direct consequence of the above mentioned eeny weeny Road Width. Everybody overtakes. Without it there is no go. Even if you are the slowest vehicle on the road, what if the Gujarat Registration Granite Truck decides to stop abruptly on the elevating road, because he's seen a sign ? "TODDY SHOP". Even your Avanti will have to overtake him, or you have 6 centimetres to pass through, or you wait till he has finished and gets back into the truck. Not everybody has the same control in overtaking. So its wrong to believe that, on the wrong side, a bus overtaking a car overtaking a cycle overtaking a dog (All in the same lane), will safely pass through. Following the width rules mentioned above, you have no space to pass through!!! So you wait, until the bus has passed you. Your speed calculation cannot account for things like, what if the tea drinking bypasser decides to bend down to pick up a 10 rupee note? or what if the motor cyclist loses his balance because of the side stand ?
Autorickshaws: Autorickshaws have one wheel in the front , which makes them believe they have the same privileges as two wheelers, and can squeeze their nose into any gap between vehicles. Autorickshaws are also the ONLY vehicles which can take an abrupt 90 degree turn, when they are running at 60 kmph. Why ? Thanks again to the SINGLE front wheel. If an auto wants to move from your left to right, what does he do? Put his stinky nose a.k.a front wheel in, you dont want to step over that single innocent wheel. But hey, its not only the wheel, there's a body to follow... so wait!
Swaraj Round (Thrissur): Truly, The freedom circle. A 20 feet wide circular display of human beings mixed modes of transport every conceived in a colourfull (polluted), musical (horns / swearing), circus! No lanes, Two set of signals, atleast 12-14 entry/exit points. No Lanes! No Lanes! No Lanes! Mixed traffic. The best thing to do here is to focus on what you see in the front. Yes, dont think about your sides, or back, just focus on what appears through the front screen. Hey, watch out for people running helker skelter, cars parked on the right, and taking reverse, buses stopping abruptly to pickup people, autorickshaws changing lanes like sperms, and occasionaly, a traffic police officer wondering why you are not wearing seat-belt!
Crazy bikers: Dear brothers at their own risk. Personally, I dont have the time to think about them, if they are cross cutting lanes, recovering from pot-holes, or balancing at the edge of road and about to fall, trying to balance passenger, luggage, helmet, clutch, break, gear and show an hand-signal. Overtake at your own risk.
phew!
Should I stop using Commas and Parantheses?
6.30 in the morning. The silver alto looks like a bullet on the relatively free kunnamkulam - thrissur NH47. 80 km/hr, not bad. I've got an appointment with the doctor. Need to rush! There is a gentle fog, which adds to the eerie early morning experience. Double strong Red Label Tea is what keeps me awake. Out of nowhere, an autorickshaw appears on the wrong side, circles on the middle, breaks, moves forward, breaks again... confused driver? drunken driver? out of control? I dont know. Nevertheles, the universe decided to say "NO" to my best efforts to keep away from him. Thud!( Initial Contact), Chlimblimbilim! (Mirrors), Plop! Spfeeeee (Tyres)
My left fender crumpled and dug a dent into the giant (this was not a normal auto, looked like a tractor with autorickshaws bodywork) autorickshaw's rear, left door jammed, mirror lay scattered, plastics reins holding the engine to the body broke, left tyre punctured, front seat passenger aghast, mud flaps twisted and choked... I came to a punctured halt. The road is still quiet. We parked the car immediately and hopped on to the next bus. The Doctor's appointment is too precious to be lost for the petty thousands we could get from the poor auto driver. On his side, half a day's paint and dent work would do fine.
Why ?
Dividers: There are no dividers. So, cyclists, human beings, dogs, cats, cars or anything mobile can CROSS the road anywhere! You need to be extra alert for the ... CROSSINGS (aargh!) crossings happen left to right, right to left, middle to left, left to middle, middle to right, right to middle, at an angle, may take a parabolic path, may suddenly stop , think and then move forward OR may stop , think and turn a U-Turn to go back to where they started. In short, the possibilities are immense... the best you can do is "SOUND HORN OK PLEASE". Which means, use horn no less than once every 10 seconds, announcing your arrival. Cyclists and human beings dont have REAR VIEW MIRRORS, Autos, Cars and Buses dont use them. So, no-one is bothered about the main road user's priviliges, when he or she enters from a pocket road. The rule is "DIVE STRAIGHT IN.. GOD will SAVE US". No driving school teaches you to use mirrors.
Road Width: The breadth of the road varies from 3 feet to 13 feet. Turn a quick turn on a super highway, and dont be surprised to find a BRIDGE where only ONE vehicle can pass at a time! So, if you grew accustomed to say moderatly wide roads for about 30 minutes and decide to Overtake... hold your horses, you dont know what lies ahead! Caution: This width is not guaranteed ahead. Lets take a normal National Highway, NH47 in kerala. Average Width of the road: 13 feet.Width of 1 Tata Bus: 6.4 feet. So, if two buses are moving in the opposite direction, they have 6 centimetres distance, between them. And the buses routinely do 80-90 km/hr. Wait a minute! Are buses the only vehicles ? The smallest car (alto) has a width of 4.8 feet, so cannot pass through the 6 centimetre gap. If the bus ahead stops for something, all vehicles behind stop. There are no footpaths, so human beings and cyclists sometimes occupy 1-2 feet. Motorbikes take 3 feet or drive in the middle. Which means, there is no choice but to Overtake!
Overtaking: The direct consequence of the above mentioned eeny weeny Road Width. Everybody overtakes. Without it there is no go. Even if you are the slowest vehicle on the road, what if the Gujarat Registration Granite Truck decides to stop abruptly on the elevating road, because he's seen a sign ? "TODDY SHOP". Even your Avanti will have to overtake him, or you have 6 centimetres to pass through, or you wait till he has finished and gets back into the truck. Not everybody has the same control in overtaking. So its wrong to believe that, on the wrong side, a bus overtaking a car overtaking a cycle overtaking a dog (All in the same lane), will safely pass through. Following the width rules mentioned above, you have no space to pass through!!! So you wait, until the bus has passed you. Your speed calculation cannot account for things like, what if the tea drinking bypasser decides to bend down to pick up a 10 rupee note? or what if the motor cyclist loses his balance because of the side stand ?
Autorickshaws: Autorickshaws have one wheel in the front , which makes them believe they have the same privileges as two wheelers, and can squeeze their nose into any gap between vehicles. Autorickshaws are also the ONLY vehicles which can take an abrupt 90 degree turn, when they are running at 60 kmph. Why ? Thanks again to the SINGLE front wheel. If an auto wants to move from your left to right, what does he do? Put his stinky nose a.k.a front wheel in, you dont want to step over that single innocent wheel. But hey, its not only the wheel, there's a body to follow... so wait!
Swaraj Round (Thrissur): Truly, The freedom circle. A 20 feet wide circular display of human beings mixed modes of transport every conceived in a colourfull (polluted), musical (horns / swearing), circus! No lanes, Two set of signals, atleast 12-14 entry/exit points. No Lanes! No Lanes! No Lanes! Mixed traffic. The best thing to do here is to focus on what you see in the front. Yes, dont think about your sides, or back, just focus on what appears through the front screen. Hey, watch out for people running helker skelter, cars parked on the right, and taking reverse, buses stopping abruptly to pickup people, autorickshaws changing lanes like sperms, and occasionaly, a traffic police officer wondering why you are not wearing seat-belt!
Crazy bikers: Dear brothers at their own risk. Personally, I dont have the time to think about them, if they are cross cutting lanes, recovering from pot-holes, or balancing at the edge of road and about to fall, trying to balance passenger, luggage, helmet, clutch, break, gear and show an hand-signal. Overtake at your own risk.
phew!
Should I stop using Commas and Parantheses?
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Snail Mail
Crib Season - Episode 3
Other than the launch of a new logo, some more stamps, and stupid services, Indian Postal service has further deteriorated. I compare the time taken to deliver a letter, and the distance it has to travel.
Incident 1:
Sam receives the hall-ticket and invitation to a common entrance test for B.Sc Microbiology at Calicut University. Interestingly, the letter arrives at 11 AM. The exam which has already started at 10 AM would be an unfair deal for Sam to attempt now, considering that 1 hour makes a huge difference for an objective exam, and that Calicut university is 80 kilometers away. When was the letter (ON I.G.S - India Government Service) posted ? A whopping 7 light years (ok, hold it.. 7 days), ago. Why does it take 7 days for an exam notification to travel 80 kilometers ?
I have been thankful earlier for this delay, because "Parent - Teacher's meet" notifications from Engineering College (305 kilometres away) and School (5 kilometers) away, arrive late (approximately a week late, irrespective of the distance), due to which Parent's never attend them! Thanks!
Incident 2:
ICICI banks sends an important notification to M, via Indian Postal Service. 2 weeks and it hasn't arrived. Since, it requires a signature and M cannot travel, upon complaining, ICICI decides to send it again. 2 more weeks, and it still hasn't arrived. ICICI decides to use a local courier and delivers it in 4 hours ( distance travelled - 18 kilometers approximately). A few weeks later, the first letter sent through Indian Post arrives! 28 days for a letter to travel 18 kilometers ? Sure, they put it on a snail!
Incident 3:
Brother's birthday. We decide to send him a post card. Ignoring my wife's suggestion to send it as "Book Post" (meaning anyone can open and read it), I decided to splurge Rs 30 extra, not for the ugly stamps and stinking paste, but for Speed (POST) and privacy. Yes, I wanted it to arrive no later than 7 days. The counter staff re-assured me that the letter's Thrissur to Pune travel would be completed in less than 3 days. I doubted. The update: He never got it! Something sent through Speed Post, how cruel of them to lose it?
"Sir, Is there a solution ? Do you F***ing really sort the letters based on priority? Do you Blind old dumb A**holes even bother to look at the "SPEED POST" or "REGISTERED POST" written in Bold ? Do you read "Gandiji's Talisman' written at every damn post office?".
"Ho ho ho... Whats the big deal? you didnt get a letter ? Go give a complaint."
Other than the launch of a new logo, some more stamps, and stupid services, Indian Postal service has further deteriorated. I compare the time taken to deliver a letter, and the distance it has to travel.
Incident 1:
Sam receives the hall-ticket and invitation to a common entrance test for B.Sc Microbiology at Calicut University. Interestingly, the letter arrives at 11 AM. The exam which has already started at 10 AM would be an unfair deal for Sam to attempt now, considering that 1 hour makes a huge difference for an objective exam, and that Calicut university is 80 kilometers away. When was the letter (ON I.G.S - India Government Service) posted ? A whopping 7 light years (ok, hold it.. 7 days), ago. Why does it take 7 days for an exam notification to travel 80 kilometers ?
I have been thankful earlier for this delay, because "Parent - Teacher's meet" notifications from Engineering College (305 kilometres away) and School (5 kilometers) away, arrive late (approximately a week late, irrespective of the distance), due to which Parent's never attend them! Thanks!
Incident 2:
ICICI banks sends an important notification to M, via Indian Postal Service. 2 weeks and it hasn't arrived. Since, it requires a signature and M cannot travel, upon complaining, ICICI decides to send it again. 2 more weeks, and it still hasn't arrived. ICICI decides to use a local courier and delivers it in 4 hours ( distance travelled - 18 kilometers approximately). A few weeks later, the first letter sent through Indian Post arrives! 28 days for a letter to travel 18 kilometers ? Sure, they put it on a snail!
Incident 3:
Brother's birthday. We decide to send him a post card. Ignoring my wife's suggestion to send it as "Book Post" (meaning anyone can open and read it), I decided to splurge Rs 30 extra, not for the ugly stamps and stinking paste, but for Speed (POST) and privacy. Yes, I wanted it to arrive no later than 7 days. The counter staff re-assured me that the letter's Thrissur to Pune travel would be completed in less than 3 days. I doubted. The update: He never got it! Something sent through Speed Post, how cruel of them to lose it?
"Sir, Is there a solution ? Do you F***ing really sort the letters based on priority? Do you Blind old dumb A**holes even bother to look at the "SPEED POST" or "REGISTERED POST" written in Bold ? Do you read "Gandiji's Talisman' written at every damn post office?".
"Ho ho ho... Whats the big deal? you didnt get a letter ? Go give a complaint."
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