Monday, December 29, 2003

to break free

This is a new day and i want every day to be a new day. Nothing more nothing less. Then i tend to form routines and practice them with high precision. May be that is a compulsion passed to me some where in my child hood or may be i am too hypocritical to say the first statement.

Saturday, December 20, 2003

Once Again The Movie - documents

Story
TRANSITION
``````````

B/W:
Camera follows two doctors from behind as they are running through a lobby.
The lobby is dim lit .
The doctors proceed to the ICU room at the end of it.
Opens door. Camera follows. stops at door.
Doctors at each side of the bed.
Nurses.
Lot of commotion.
CUT:
Camera shows ECG Screen. FLAT LINE.
CUT:
Camera pans down the wall at head of patient to finally focus on eyes of patient.
FACE NOT FULLY SHOWN. ONLY EYES.

CHANGE TO Color:
Extreme Close up of eyes.
ECG tone changes to Alarm.
Eyes open as if in a jolt.

CUT:
Camera at side of bed:
Coincide with he gets up as if in a jolt.
He takes some time to recover.

CUT:
Camera follows his hands to switch off the ALARM.
THere is a calendar near the ALarm. November 1999.

CUT:

```````````````````````````````````````````````````
Original Chronological Order.

Snap shots of lovers.
Speeding bike shot.
BLACK OUT ACCIDENT.
ICU SHOT. FLAT LINE.
CAMERA PANS DOWN WALL. CLOCK ON WALL SHOWS 10:10 pm.
CLOSE UP ON EYES.
CHANGE TO EYES COLOR>
GETS UP.
FATHER COMES - COUNSELLINGINU POKANDE ?
CONFUSED.
DEJA VU ?
BREAKFAST TABLE>
" BUT ELECTRONICS WILL GET OVER AT 416 "
COUNSELLING HALL.
COUNSELLING IS FROM 300 TO 450.

" SORRY ELECTRONICS OVER AT 416 "

DEJA VU SEQUENCE:
FATHER: IS ELECTRICAL THERE?
COUNSELLING: YES.
FATHER: WE WILL TAKE IT THEN. SHALL WE SON?
CUT:
FATHER SHAKING HIM: WHAT HAPPENED ?
HE WAKES UP AS IF FROM DREAM.
SAME SEQUENCE REPEATS>

" I DONT WANT Engineering. I AM GOING TO JOIN FOR BA "
AT COLLEGE:
MEETS ANOTHER GIRL AT SAME POSITION AS IN SNAP SHOT 1.
STARTS HEARING VOICE OF ANOTHER GIRL : DONT LEAVE ME.
CUT TO LORDS>
WITH OTHER GIRL ;
SAME AS SNAP SHOT 2.
GIVES RING. CRYING OF ANOTHER GIRLS GETS STRONGER AND STRONGER.
CLOSE UP ON HIS EYES. HE CLOSES EYES AND COVERS HIS EARS AS IF IN DISTRESS.
B/W
EXTREME CLOSE UP.
CLOSED EYES OPEN .
CAMERA PULLS BACK.
FLAT LINE BECOMES NORMAL.
CLOCK ON WALL SHOWS 10:15 PM.
NINA AT BED SIDE. CRYING.
DOCTOR: I HAVE NEVER SEEN A FLAT LINER WAKE UP!
DOCTOR AND NURSE AFTER MAKING SURE EVERYTHING IS NORMAL LEAVES.
NINA: ( STILL CRYING ) I LOVE YOU...
HE: just SMILES.
V.O. I DONT KNOW HOW I AM GOING TO SAY THIS.
I KNOW MY LOVE FOR YOU WASNT REAL.
I KNOW I CANT CHANGE EVERYTHING.
BUT I CAN DO THIS....
HE: SORRY... I NEVER REALLY LOVED YOU.
FADE OUT TO BLACK.

DEATH TAUGHT ME WHAT LIFE COULDNT
BUT I GOT A SECOND CHANCE TO COME BACK.
EVERYBODY DONT.

CREDITS.

script draft
FADE IN:
Extreme CU on young man, SID, lying in bed. Tear-streaked NINA holds his hand. We hear off screen voices….but only just.

OS1: never seen a flatliner recover…
OS2: me neither….guess these things happen….
NINA: I love you….
SID(hesitant): Thank you….
SID(voice over): but I don’t feel the same way anymore. Death can do that to people sometimes.

Cut

B&W
Camera moves back focusing on two doctors as they pace through the corridors through the moderate crowd.

Dr1: so what is new?
Dr2: the usual……loverbirds in an accident….
Dr1: situation?
Dr2: the girl is ok….bruised but …ok. The guy is looking bad though.
Dr1: lets take a look…

Doctors abruptly turn into the emergency room.
Fade out.

3colour
camera follows sid as he walks through the main lobby of the college…..

sid v.o:
life looks better with O.Henry than with Ohms law….
Peer pressure to perform..peer pressure to conform…
None of that here…..
Even if I am surrounded by people who don’t understand me….I can at least understand myself….
If only I could do something about these voices in my head.

Cut
Slow motion as a group of students step aside….revealing a beautiful young girl who is blissfully unaware of our attention…

Sid v.o: she was an angel no less……but what does this mean???
Cut
Camera on sid as he looks around.as if trying to figure out where the voice comes from.

Nina v.o: why did you do this to me?????
You know I am waiting for you here……
Where are you going????

B&W
Camera at the door of the emergency room. We see a hurry of technicians…..
Dr1: ok clear this room.
Dr2: he is going into arrest.

Nurse draws the green curtain across the camera. Which quickly blacks out.

2 colour

camera on breakfast table…sid is eating his breakfast with little interest…
father: so your final choice is electronics right????
Sid doesn’t react.
Father: sid???!!
Sid(with a start):what!
Father: I asked if your choice was electronics?
Sid: my choice doesn’t matter……besides electronics wont be available by they time my counseling comes up…..
Mother: just like you ……always the pessimist…
Sid: no mom……realist……rank 421 takes the last seat in CET…. And mine is 422 i may get only electrical or mechanical….

Sid walks off with his parents staring behind him.

Cut

Inside the counseling room…..
Cu on counselor.
Counselor: sorry the last seat for electronics in CET was allotted to the student just before you.

Wide angle shot on sid’s profile. dad turns to look at him incredulously….

Sid (voiceover):
My life was laid out for me…..like a well trodden road.question is….would walk down it again????

Counselor; so what do you want????
Sid: pardon?
Counselor: is going to be electrical or mechanical engg in CET..or looking for communication elsewhere in kerala?
Sid: I think I will join the B.A English course thank you…

Silence….

Counselor(gets angry): what do you mean…..
Father: he is a bit sick…sorry…(to sid)what are you saying bou?
Sid:I think you heard me….
Camera pulls back as sid walks off..leaving father pleading with an irate counselor…we cannot hear what they are saying.

Sid(V.O): this is freedom….you write someone’s story…your own story…don’t like it…just start over again…could say that this is life…but then again…..

Fade out.

B&W
Close up on dr1
Dr1: I am losing him…..
Dr2: I think we have already lost him.
Wide angle….
We see both doctors bent over a patient we cannot see.
Dr1: we better prepare her….do you think she can take it.
Dr2: lets find out.
Cut

Corridor. Nina is sitting worried on a bench. Dr2 comes up.she is quickly on her feet.
Dr2: I am sorry…we lost him.
Nina sits back with a soft sigh…..she is drained.
Dr2 says something but we don’t hear it…..
Fade out

1 Colour
Camera fades in as the POV of a prone SID.
Obscure voices from the OS….
OS(female): wake him up will you???
FATHER who enters the frame, yells a reply….looks directly into the camera.
FATHER(in Malayalam): so the fever is all gone. Get ready for the counseling…
SID(surprised): counseling?????
FATHER(SMILING): may be the fever isn’t gone…..quick boy!!!! No time to lose…

Camera focuses on the bedside clock the calendar shows distinctly…the year 1999 october..

Cut

Camera on SID sitting on the bed.
SID: no it can’t be……am I awake….am I alive…..

The camera follows sid as he walks towards the bathroom.

Cut


Fade in B&W
Cu on ecg monitor.
Grey flat line traces its way.
We hear distant murmurs……
Nina v.o: why did you do this to me?????
You know I am waiting for you here……
Where are you going????

Gradually screen colours as the ecg turns green and comes alive with a start….
Nina: Doctor!!!!
DR1: good lord!!!!
Dr2: never seen a flatliner recover.

Fade out
CREDITS.

working title
Working title

NeoCraft presents

A ZeusProductions film

Snapshots…..
B&W
Intimate moments between our two lovers..
Photos are dropped into our field of vision. Camera turns to center the fallen photographs.
Soft back ground music…overshadowed by the voiceovers.

1st
NINA looks up the steps to see SIDDARTH come out of ice-net.
Both lock eyes.freeze.
(voiceover)

Zoom to sid
SID
She just stepped in….just like that.

Zoom to nina
NINA
There was something about the way he looked……

2nd still
Lords restaurant. Table for 2.
Profile shot of both. Looking intensely into each other’s eyes. As SID gives her a ring.

NINA
That was a dream evening…..
SID
You could say one thing led to another……


Freeze frame of sid and nina on bike…from the side.
Unfreeze.
Sound of a cruising bike…..
As the bike leaves the frame….leaving us with only bg sounds.

Music picks up tempo….reaches its crescendo….which coincides with the sounds of the accident.

Black out.

Sounds of sirens and rushing feet….
DOCTOR: we have an emergency here……..

Sirens fade as we fade in thru POV of NINA who is lying in bed.
Insistent voices say something, which is drowned by the sound of the still fading sirens.

FATHER enters frame.
Hand moves above the camera as if touching NINA’s forehead….

FATHER: aaa…..pani ellam poyyallo……pettunnu ready ayittivennum counsellinginnu povaan…..

NINA: acha….

Bare lefthand enters frame and rubs the finger where the ring should have been….


Fucked up story line beyond all recognition. FUSLBAR.


Transition

Story and Screenplay
Nihas Abdul Rahman.
Bala Sankar.

Shot 1 <>
Extreme CU of profile of the young man, SID, lying in bed. Tear-streaked NINA holds his hand, is just out of focus. We hear off screen voices….but only just.
OS1: never seen a flatliner recover…
OS2: me neither….guess these things happen….
Focus on nina.
NINA: I love you….


Shot 2 <>
Wide angle shot of nina and sid, from above.
SID(hesitant): Thank you….
SID(voice over): but I don’t feel the same way anymore. Death kills…(sarcastic laugh)…at least a part of me. We will never be the same again.

Shot 3<>
Camera moves back focusing on two doctors as they pace through the corridors
Dr1: so what is new?
Dr2: the usual……lover birds in an accident….
Dr1: where is it from this time?
Dr2: tvm engg college…
Dr1: situation?
Dr2: the girl is ok….bruised but …ok. The guy is looking bad though.
Dr1: lets take a look…

Doctors abruptly turn into the emergency room.
Camera moves forward and turns to face the door way through which the doctors passed. We see a doctor close the door on the camera.we barely see the room.
Fade out.

Shot 4<>
camera leads sid as he walks through the main lobby of the college…..
sid v.o:
life looks better with O.Henry than with Ohms law….
Peer pressure to perform..peer pressure to conform…
None of that here…..
Even if I am surrounded by people who don’t understand me….I can at least understand myself….
If only I could do something about these voices in my head.


Shot 5:<>
Slow motion as a group of students step aside….revealing a beautiful young girl who is blissfully unaware of our attention…
Sid v.o: she was an angel no less……but what does this mean???

Shot 6:<>
Camera on sid as he looks around.as if trying to figure out where the voice comes from.
Nina v.o: why did you do this to me?????
You know I am waiting for you here……
Where are you going?

Shot 7:<>
Camera inside the room.we see the doc close the door.we pull back to the upper right corner of the bed as the doctor approaches the bed. The other doctor appears in the frame.
Dr1: this doesn’t look good.
Dr2: he is going into arrest.
Nurse draws the green curtain across the camera. Which quickly blacks out.

Shot 8:<>
Camera on breakfast table…sid is eating his breakfast with little interest…
father: so your final choice is electronics right????
Sid doesn’t react.
Father: sid???!!
Sid(with a start):what!
Father: I asked if your choice was electronics?
Sid: my choice doesn’t matter……besides electronics wont be available by they time my counseling comes up…..
Mother: just like you(looks at father) ……always the pessimist…
Sid: no mom……just a realist……rank 421 takes the last seat in CET…. And mine is 422 I may get only electrical or mechanical….
Sid walks off with his parents staring behind him.who then look at each other, surprised.

Shot 9:<>
Inside the counseling room…..
Cu on counselor.
Counselor: sorry the last seat for electronics in CET was allotted to the student just before you.

Shot 10:<>
Wide angle shot on sid’s profile. dad turns to look at him incredulously….

Shot 11:<>
Close up, Sid.
Sid (voiceover):
My life was laid out for me…..like a well trodden road.question is….would I walk down it again????
Counselor(V.O): so what do you want????
Sid: pardon?

Shot 12:<>
Wide Angle.
Counselor: is it going to be electrical or mechanical engg in CET..or looking for communication elsewhere in kerala?
Sid: I think I will join the B.A English course thank you…
Silence….
Counselor(gets angry): what do you mean…..

Shot 13:<>
Camera behind counselor.
Focus father.
Father: he is a bit sick…sorry…(to sid)what are you saying ?
Sid:I think you heard me….
Camera rises as sid walks off..leaving father pleading with an irate counselor…we cannot hear what they are saying.

Shot 14:<>
Camera in corridor. We watch sid’s back.
Sid(V.O): this is freedom….you write someone’s story…your own story…don’t like it…just start over again…could say that this is life…but then again…..
Fade out.

Shot 15:<>
Close up on dr1
Dr1: I am losing him…..
Dr2:(v.o) I think we have already lost him.

Shot 16:<>
Foot of the bed.Wide angle….
We see both doctors bent over a patient we cannot see.
Dr1: we better prepare her….do you think she can take it.
Dr2: lets find out.


Shot 17:<>
Corridor. Camera focuses Nina’s profile. Nina is sitting worried on a bench. We see an out of focus Dr2 come up. Nina is quickly on her feet.Camera rises with nina to bring both nina and dr in frame.

Shot 18:<>
Close up Doctor.
Dr2: I am sorry…we lost him.

Shot 19:<>
Camera infront of Neena.
Nina sits back with a soft sigh…..she is drained.
Dr2 says something but we don’t hear it…..
Fade out

Shot 20:<>
Camera fades in as the POV of a prone SID.
Obscure voices from the OS….
OS(female): wake him up will you???
FATHER who enters the frame, yells a reply….looks directly into the camera.
FATHER(in Malayalam): so the fever is all gone. Get ready for the counseling…

Shot 21:<>
Camera on Sid getting up.
SID(surprised): counseling?????
FATHER(SMILING): may be the fever isn’t gone…..quick boy!!!! No time to lose…
Camera turns to focus on the bedside clock the calendar shows distinctly…the year 1999 october..

Shot 22:<>
Camera at foot of bed. Focus on Sid.
SID: no it can’t be……am I awake….am I alive…..
Sid gets up.
The camera turns as Sid moves to bathroom.


Shot 23:<>
Fade in B&W
Cu on ecg monitor.
Grey flat line traces its way.
We hear distant murmurs……

Nina v.o: “why did you do this to me?????
You know I am waiting for you here……
Where are you going?”

Gradually screen colours as the ecg turns green and comes alive with a start….
Nina(v.o): “Doctor!”
DR1(v.o): “Good lord!”
Dr2(v.o): “Never seen a flatliner recover”.

Repeat Shot 1:<>
Focus on nina.
NINA: I love you….

Repeat Shot 2:<>
Wide angle shot of nina and sid, from above , FREEZE.
SID : but, DO I ?
Fade out.

Credits.

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Extra Shots for Chrono.

Shot 24:<>
Intimate moments between our two lovers..
Photos are dropped into our field of vision. Camera turns to center the fallen photographs.
Soft back ground music…overshadowed by the voiceovers.

1st
NINA looks up the steps to see SIDDARTH come out of ice-net.
Both lock eyes.freeze.
(voiceover)
Zoom to sid
SID: She just stepped in….just like that.
Zoom to nina
NINA: There was something about the way he looked……

2nd still
Lords restaurant. Table for 2.
Profile shot of both. Looking intensely into each other’s eyes. As SID gives her a ring.

NINA : That was a dream evening…..
SID : You could say one thing led to another……




Shot 25:<>
Freeze frame of sid and nina on bike…from the side.
Unfreeze.
Sound of a cruising bike…..
As the bike leaves the frame….leaving us with only bg sounds.
Music picks up tempo….reaches its crescendo….which coincides with the sounds of the accident.
Black out.

Shot 26:<>
Photos are dropped into our field of vision. Camera turns to center the fallen photographs.
Soft back ground music…overshadowed by the voiceovers.
1st
PREETHI looks up the steps to see SIDDARTH come out of ice-net.
Both lock eyes.freeze.
(voiceover)
Zoom to sid
SID: She just stepped in….just like that.
Zoom to nina
PREETHI: There was something about the way he looked……

2nd still
Lords restaurant. Table for 2.
Profile shot of both. Looking intensely into each other’s eyes. As SID gives her a ring.
PREETHI : That was a dream evening…..
SID : You could say one thing led to another……

Shot 27:<>
Doctor’s V.O: He is going in to arrest.
Camera rapid motion. From ECG Flat line. To clock on wall (11:20).
Close up on eyes.

Shot 28:<>
Close up on eyes. Opens.


Shot 29:<>
Close up on Last Photo (PREETHI-SID).
Hand enters frame to Tear it.


Cast

Cast
````

Sid: joe
Nina: Nina.
Preethi : Preethi.
Doc1: Balu.
Doc2: Aparna.
Father:lrd
Counsellor: ajay

Locations:
Hospital. – ICU + Corridor.
College. – Corridor + Class Room.

Props.
ECG.
Stethoscope + Lab Coat.
Computers.

shooting day

SHOT TAKE IN OUT DESCRIPTION
HOSPITAL ICU
7 4 1.59 2.25 ok
15 1 2.25 2.47 poor dialogue
2 2.47 3.14 ok
16 1 3.14 3.42 eyes open (JOE)
2 3.42
3 3.5* 4.32 ok
16A 1 4.34 5.06 ok
1 1 5.06 5.32 ok
2 1 5.32 5.54 ok
32(zoom) 1 5.54 6.31 ok
32(static for still) 2 6.31 7.14 ok (cut shots)
33 1 7.14 7.37 ok fast
34 close up 1 7.37 8.27 joe
35 close up 1 8.27 8.39 nina
3 1 8.39 9.25 ok
2 9.25 10.07 sound
3 10.07 10.53 ok
17 1 10.51 11.25 ok
2 11.25 12.01
3 12.01 12.51 ok
18 1 12.51 13.5
2 13.5 14.08
3 14.08 14.21
4 14.21 14.49 ok
VOICE OVERS
1 15.01 15.16 not ok
2 15.16 15.29 why did you….
1 15.29 15.41 why do… (ok)
1 15.41 15.54 DOCTOR!! (ok)
2 15.54 16.02 DOCTOR!! (ok)
1 16.1 16.14 Two Doctors
2 16.14 16.27
3 16.3 16.42 ok
1 16.42 x not ok
2 16.54 x DO I (ok) - joe
1 17.02 17.14 I don’t feel … (joe) ok

BEDROOM

MISC 17.23 MOVING… JOE SLEEPING
20 1 17.35 18.14 JOE STANDS UP -SOUND NOT OK
2 18.14 18.52 SOUND NOT OK
(No clap) 3 18.52 19.34 OK
20A 1 19.34 20.14 X
2 20.17 20.44 OK
21 1 20.47 21.07 OK
2 21.07 21.31 STRAIGHT (OK)
MISC 3 21.31 21.46 FACE (STRAIGHT)
21A 1 21.46 22.07 OK
2 22.07 22.36 HANDS
8 1 22.47 23.2 X
2 23.2 24.17 X
3 24.15 25.11 OK
8A 1 25.09 26.25 OK

CGPU

9 1 26.25 26.4 CLOSE UP AJAY (X)
2 26.4 26.59 OK
9A 1 26.59 27.18 PROFILE (OK)
12 1 27.2 27.43 OK
12B 1 27.43 27.57 X
2 27.57 28.07 OK
3 28.07 28.12 PROFILE (OK)
10 1 28.12 X X
2 X 28.36 X
3 28.36 28.52 OK
10A 1 28.52 29.42 MISC CLOSE UP JOE
12A 1 29.42 30.07 OK
1 30.07 30.48 UNCLE RESPONSE JOE LEAVING
2 30.48 31.02 X
3 30.48 31.15 OK
13 1 31.15 31.43 OK
NO CLAP
Z1 1 31.43 X JOE WALKING (BACK)
2 31.54 X DO
Z2 1 32.18 X (FRONT) WITH FILE
2 32.4 X DO
Z3 1 33.03 X WITHOUT FILE
2 33.15 X DO

Z4 1 33.38 34.08 COMING UP STAIRS -NOT OK
2 34.08 34.39 OK
Z5 1 34.49 35 C.U JOE
2 35 35.1 OK
Z6 1 35.1 X LOOK
2 35.38 X
3 35.58 36.09
Z7 1 36.09 38.07 FREE CORRIDOR
Z8 1 38.07 X PREETHI TURNING AROUND (OK)
2 X 38.26 OK
Z9 1 38.24 X JOE L->R MID ANGLE
6A 1 39.01 X CLOSEUP BLUR…(NOT ok)
2 39.15 39.28 X
3 X 39.37 OK
25 X 40.37 ROMANCE (ACACIA)
40.37 40.55
40.55 41.1
41.1 41.23
Z10 1 41.49 X WALKING TOGETHER TO .. (NOT OK)
2 42.02 X X
Z11 1 42.11 X WALKING TOGETHER FRO…..(NOT OK)
2 42.48 X X
3 43.08 X OK
MAKING - UNTIMED
VOICE OVER

SID1 47.12 47.41 OK
SID2 47.41 X X
47.45 47.56 OK
SID3 47.56 48.03 OK
SID4 48.03 48.14 OK
SID5 48.14 48.23 OK
SID6 48.23 48.36 OK
X 48.36 CUT SHE WAS AN ANGEL …
48.48 48.52
X 48.52 49.03 DEATH TAUGHT ME…
SID7 49.03 49.17 OK

JOE'S BIRTHDAY 49.17 50.52

INTRO V.O
NIHAS 50.52 51.12 OK
51.12 51.26 NOT OK

ECG SEQUENCE 51.26 END



Thursday, December 18, 2003

words

the pen thinking of itself
a man thinking of himself
and of what i shant know
but those words i shall crave for

bala you inspire me with your poems.

an old poem

---common cold

Basking in the glory of my health
I couldnt see you coming with the wind
You made love with me
And you made me weak
You made me cold when i wanted heat
I loved you when you stirred me deep
But i hated you when you made me sleep
I never tried to drug you out
Not even when you stifled my throat
And smothered my sound with your love
But once you said its time to part
And you pushed me back to my solitude

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

Everything that has a beginning has an end

Have found time within my turmoil after a long time now...My pen lies lifeless between my fingers and my mind rests listless between my ears.

I squeeze it to force the ink.
I squeeze it and force myself to think.
But no thoughts. All noughts.
Down again to straight reporting, though shades of poetry still take shape.
Rhythm unbidden creeps in.
Rhyme unplanned seeps in.

The first drops through the crack in the dam....gather momentum....gathering fellow drops in revolt.
Fighting the dam and breaking the vault.
All the riches held within fell to ground in a blinding shower.
Everything is destroyed....in a vulgar display of power.

The time will come when all my life...each waking moment...each sleeping second....each dreaming hour...shall meet that point in space and time....for which a whole lifetime I will wait.
Preparing for it and hoping that I am not late.
When the time comes few will know. Before they comprehend I must go.
A purpose I shall serve, of which none maybe aware.
Saint or sinner in else's eyes, I will just not care.

When that happens Death would be a natural extension of life.
And I shall sleep, my brow uncreased by strife.

movie diary from bala

17-12-2002

It was two days before the university exam. And a day before my sister’s birthday. But I remember it better for other reasons. Or at least I hope these words will help me trap those moments forever.
It must have been about eight at night. There I was lost in the irrelevance of mundane conversations with Sijin and Kiran. But that day was a mite different than others…..I had what seemed like a brainwave, then. I shared the burden of my discovery with fellow madman Nihas, who lapped up the idea.
And so we decided to feed our inner demons….our desire to see the words ‘film-maker’ written under our names….our 15 minutes of fame…our day in the sun when we could look at the industry in the eye and say “We are here!!!! Look out”. We tanked our Christmas vacation plans and decided to make this movie on a shoestring budget. People asked why we weren’t going home, and we would say we were going to make a movie. The reaction was always the same. “No way”. Understandable. They were all listening to us rave and rant about making a movie for nearly 2 years now. Something told me this time was different and somehow we managed to scrounge around 3000 bucks a piece. In the classic Bowfinger tradition, we convinced ourselves that all movies were made with just 6000 Indian Rupees.
Then it began the wait for the two interminable days to go by before we could embark on our …….journey?! Maybe it was one. Then again…..

19-12-2002

And so we said our good-byes to all the doubting Thomases that left for their Christmas vacation with a joke to take home. Us and our story. The elation of a 10 day break before the next exam and the fact that we were going to make our movie played a major part in what we did that day. However, we did…NOTHING. Our major hiccup was a classy idea by Nihas to change the protagonist’s gender. Though I suspected that there ulterior motives behind such a move, I agreed in the beginning, but before long we knew our story, a passable one in the beginning, was now royally f***ed. But we promised ourselves that we would finish the story on 20th and finish the shoot by Christmas. All I wanted was an original story. All Nihas wanted was a movie he could make. We failed to meet halfway.




20-12-2002

We stared dumbly at the monitor as we sat to write the screenplay. We couldn’t agree on the colour of shit that morning. So we took our disagreement to the film-makers court. A court where, each day, a million judges pass their collective verdict on every director’s venture. The theatre. The fateful movie was ‘Kaante’. As luck would have it, the tapes hadn’t arrived for the first day’s first show and we meekly headed back to hostel. I told myself the omens weren’t right and we were rightfully prevented from watching a plagiarized work before we embarked on our own. Long live Quentin Tarantino. Now at our wits’ end we set deadlines for our screenplay. If by nine that night we hadn’t come up with anything, we would adapt an O.Henry short story for movie. If that didn’t work out by ten, we would go back to our original story…the very first screenplay we wrote, inspired by Guy Ritchie. And we weren’t prepared for contingencies beyond that…..

That night after several hours in front of my comp, we returned to the very same story that we had f***ed the day before, only this time we omitted the proposed sex change for the protagonist. Gotta say we liked it when it was finished. Was nothing new as far as stories go, but we had faith in our presentation. I must acknowledge here with a touch of disappointment, that the concept of our presentation was nothing new. I admit it. We stole the story telling technique from Christopher Nolan’s Memento…..but that was the compromise we had to make to get the story ready in time for the shoot.

Nihas suckered me into playing a small part in the movie. I agreed thinking that he would be my hero for the movie. Little did I know.

21-12-2002

A pleasant Sunday. We headed to meet our editor Jalston, with the 5 page screenplay in hand. As we expected, he couldn’t tell the head from the tail of the story. When we finished explaining, he seemed moderately interested. He gave us his last words of advice and convinced us that Nihas would have to be behind the camera all the time. A decision that left us scrambling at the last minute for a hero. Now I was stranded in front of the camera and Nihas was jammed behind it. I have no faith in my acting skills, but I felt that at least we both would go down together. In front of the camera and behind it. Through all this we scrambled through the bylanes of the city in scooters, bikes, public transport, private transport…..and what not……our cast was barely there. Of the three major parts to be played, we had only 1 confirmed actress. Neena Cherian. Our other ‘stars’ were unavailable for comment or commitment. But we had a moronic sense of confidence that told us that everything was going to be F.I.N.E fine….

Now Neena is an established screen goddess in our college circles and so her casting and participation was natural. I must tell you it was a proud moment for me when I asked her to act in our movie and she agreed without even going through the story!!! For the other major female part I had my eyes set on Preethi latha. I convinced Nihas that she was perfect. There was only one problem…reaching her. I knew she would agree to the idea if only we could talk to her. I was confident about my skills in convincing people to act foolish. Aparna G Menon……aaah what can we say about this lady???? She was the key all our success. The door to the land of possibilities. There was only one other problem. We could never reach these great people. And of course there was the unresolved issue of finding our hero.

But these were times when even the sun seemed kind…every day smelled sweet. All I could see was our movie opening amidst rave reviews, exploding camera flashes, cackling reporters, Cannes and champagne……yeah right…we got carried away…

But after night fall, the both of us became zombies. We felt nothing. Understood nothing. Blanking out totally. So nobody can be expected to remember or record what happened from 7 in the evening to 9 the next morning. The long suffering Shibin, who had, at his own risk, chosen to stay behind with us, put up with us morons through his movie marathons.5 VCDs at a time. He was the machine. When we offered him a small role in the film, he immediately gave us a warm response. An extended middle finger.
Yeah right.

22-12-2002

Nihas finally got to talk to the camera man. We were scheduled to meet him that afternoon. But there was also this appointment I had with my local guardian, my financier and my confidant. My sister. I had planned to keep the news of this movie away from her but when I met her that day I spilled the beans like the numb-nut I am. She wasn’t in the least impressed, but seemed to like the story and asked me to tell dad about it.

A quick word about my dad. He hates art and movies. So I knew talking him into letting me do it was pointless and also a wasted effort. Any way we left my sis’s place feeling light headed. We were still very optimistic. Nihas and I. We finally hunted the camera man down and asked him all about the expenses and he gave us a figure that was too good to be true. 1300 rupees per day. I could barely believe it. So we walked on with more than just a jump in our step. Nihas had a few reservations as we still hadn’t found our hero. But I stuck my policy on team work….compensate and complement your team-mate. So I kept telling him over and over again that everything would be ok. And I believed it for a while. We called that nice man who had heard our pathetic stories and contrived plots for untold hours without a single complaint and with genuine interest. Rakesh Ram. I can’t tell you how much we are in the debt of this quiet man. We called him on a whim and told him to come right over and be our sound man and help us get on with it basically. He was flustered at the sudden attack and told us he would decide by evening. I knew he would come. I had a brainwave (I was having a bit too many for my own liking anyway…) and I suggested the casting of Joe Chemmanam as our hero. Nihas had reservations but I told him he had dedication and he wouldn’t refuse us anyway. That clinched it. So we called Joe and explained our situation. He was ever the sportsman and rose to the challenge even if he was unsure about his own skills. Now we made our final attempt to contact Aparna who finally told us that she would come to college the next day and we could discuss things in person. A delightful proposition. Pretty soon it was evening and we were dullards again. Though we still hadn’t reached Preethi we (or more precisely, I) ran into hot water when I called her at home and got a frosty response from her father who hung up on me rather unceremoniously.

23-12-2002

I waited by the phone stupidly. Waiting for it to ring and waiting for Aparna to be at the other end. Joe turned up in his trusted Splendor and was half amused and half apprehensive about our proposal. Having waited long enough for Aparna to call, we took the initiative and called her at her place. It turned out that she had left a message with Ajay P P, our honourable Gen Sec. and the best news was she fixed up an appointment that evening at her place. Amidst all this commotion Suraj, who was placed in Mindtree came over to give us his treat. We coordinated a mass transport arrangement whereby the 5 of us (Suraj, Joe, Shibin, Nihas and I) could end up in City gate, Sreekaryam. Must have been Suraj’s lucky day as only fried rice was available and he got away with it….
I somehow managed to get Ajay to write a letter addresses to our principal allowing us to shoot the film in college during Christmas.
After lunch Nihas and I met S.K.Mohan and got permission after some drama (only to be expected when you are dealing with a madman like him!). After a quick nap, both of us prepared to meet Aparna. Joe agreed to accompany us and so we got to go in his car. We found the place without much trouble and quickly got down to the basics. I told the story for the nth time in my patented style (ask Nihas…) and everyone was impressed!! Aparna was of the opinion that if we could convey exactly what we wanted to say, it would be a good movie. After explaining it all we sat back and watched her co-ordinate our locations, cast, props and what not through a silver tongue and handy mobile phone. She even got the elusive Preethi Latha on phone, who promptly turned up to visit us at Aparna’s place after she had me explain the story and her role in the film. We wasted some time at Aparna’s place probably because we were entering our twilight zone of retardation. Late that evening we set out to purchase films, props and to finalize the cameraman.

We stumbled for the first time. The cameraman brought out all his hidden costs and now the daily rate shot up to 3000 a day. I was deflated and getting angrier by the moment but Nihas kept a cool head and haggled it make it 2500 per day. We called it a day and trudged back to hostel. I had my first reservations about the entire project. Nevertheless, we went about converting my room in hostel as an I.C.U room in case Aparna couldn’t arrange something better. Fell asleep by 3:00 in the morning.

by bala

Sunday, December 14, 2003

And we come back to life.....

After a long self imposed silence, the three voices murmur quiet frustrations...some heard some unheard...some said some unsaid...
i was at the point of running away from my job when i finally had my review.....the kind of lies i told them about my committment to the company made me want to puke....but on the upside.....even the company's managing director made it a point to sit in during my review.....i was flattered.....he did that only for one other equally promising candidate....so even i am undecided about my supposed career move....all my applications have been in the cold for a while now....i am mostly resigned to a fate of spanners and grease inside dark lift shafts......

i sometimes get some free time in the evening....i usually head to planet M and listen to songs at their listening posts and in house radio.......sometimes i sing metallica and other heavy shit aloud as i ride my boss's bike.....i am really losing it man......

neo desist from reblogs.... i love you in your crystalline form......ram keep up the non penetrative sex!!!!

i really miss you guys....and i really fear the day when we might meet.....have we changed beyond recognition?? i can barely maintain a decent conversation with my friends anymore....when any of them calls me, i maintain a strained conversation. the same is true even when i call them.....

i am a man hater now....some body please help me....

Saturday, December 13, 2003

What was sleep ? huh ?

When i close my eyes,
I see lights .. tiny yellow lights all over,
some neurons fire at random ...
some javascript error creeps up,
I have forgotten to BLINK! my eyes are dry but wide open .. or are they ?
This monitor just rippled .. just like water .. like a stone is thrown in .. or did it ?
enough .. i am gonna be selfish .. or should i not ?
gosh! somebody get me out of this stinking pot ..
somebody just unplug me ..
and cleanse my whole system!!!!

Scintillating!!!!

I am RE-Publishing BALA's blog .. because this piece is too good..

Arrows fly from left and right
Is it a friend or foe?
I raise my arm and strike at night
At whom? I 'll never know.
Through the night I fought the fight
Was it a battle? Was it a war?
In the calmness of the morning light
And then...no more.
Alone I stand, sword in hand
At the edge of the battlefield.
Shifting sands of that aging land
Scarred but it had healed.

Monday, December 08, 2003

Dream

one
i am reinstituted in a prestigeous and strict high school. i have a single room in the boarding facility and its a whole new world out there. i am afraid of the whole situation
two
i am seduced by a girl. she wants to have non-penetrative sex with me. we started as friends sharing a bed and ended up all sweaty cuddly.