Monday, January 31, 2005


The True Story of the ... Network.

When the first cis network was born, there was a man inside , who could change anything and everything he wanted. Partha, was bent upon finding out new loopholes in the network for everyday needs like checking mails, sending greeting and so forth. It was Partha, who first discovered that yahoo mail was accessible thru russian site links and harmless Address book links present on the yahoo dashboard. In those days , site filters primarily worked on URL (whats typed in the Address bar in your explorer). All was well until the machines launched the next version of websense, and a host of other utilities.

The free people ( Church of the Swimming elephant) worked tirelessly to find out new ways to mail, chat and blog. This was probably the second generation of anomalies in the so called secure system, which unchecked would amount to a escalating probability of disaster. The second generation Zionites were cleaned off in
operations vis a vis "mt-ohi grewl" & "mammoo-sweep".

While the first and second generation zionites made use of their individual skills , the third generation was solely focused on "Social Engineering"; which was by far the best technique, as the amount of time, energy investment was meagre and there were bonuses and allowances apart from the regular benefits. However due to frequent rotation of resources , this system soon failed.

The fourth generation free people, went back to the dark ages , ploughed the hard soil of Internet Explorer and come up with a new technique code named "xypro".
They used the machines inherent weakness to let some of the gates open for their own use. Though the keys to the gates were frequently changed, the zionites combined a form of fusion of Social Engineering and Sniffer tools to get hold of the new keys within minutes of being created. This continued for a while. Bhairu, Praan , Argentum and Cipher were the prominent members of the church in those days.

Zionites also played cat and mouse with the wormies and agents of the system, for accessing the very precious backdoors to mail, chat and free downloads. using the lan setting, setting up new internet connections, using autoxypro enabled, using script enabled xypro, regedit... the machines with closed the gates one after the other. was the last human city. it was buried deep down in the shackles of 4th floor and was discovered by guru nanak and guru bhairav. for months, this gate was used to broadcast real player signals, internet radio signals, and download tons of free music. zionites were ethical people and never used these gates for any un-ethical work (for definition of ethics -- contact guru xipher). these gates opened up google news and a plethora of tech forums containing all the javascripts and ready made reusable components one would ever need. After all, everyone's work is essentially copy/paste.

However, the Architect (code name : boo ;; scary enough ?) shut down the last pirated port. We have been waiting hence for the next revolution, for the new zion to take birth, for the new neo, morpheus and trinity , where art theee ???

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Home Trip - aka - Revelations Part I

When i come to know that , the increased zest for life, the feeling that "i am
running out of time", the likeliness towards "Rabba-Agony/Ecstacy" Mix, and the
forever drugged feeling of infinite high and infinite low in quick succession
,all finally desolve unto not another game of cancer , my birth star, but a
disease which had been growing within all the while , i am humbled .. yes i

the perpetual fear of not finding words to express myself always haunted me ...
it was like being gagged and made to watch horror movies, i couldnt scream out
what i felt . now, i have no idea, why this sentence is here ....

so Mr. Paul Thanookaran (surgeon), took one look at me and said.. "alright , turn
over.." , after a little naughty inspection he said
" son, you are bleeding inside, you need help soon! can you extend your leave ?"
"whats the matter ? "
"you need an operation , asap!, preferably today evening ? 7 ' o clock would be ok ?"

Nooooooo ! Seven o clock wouldnt be ok , Not that i wanted my birth and death
times to coincide , but because i knew i didnt need an operation. So , i smiled and thanked the doc for the agony inspection and promised upon good lord that i would return at 7 pm to be operated upon . Even my 87 model maruti sensed the danger and promptly started at one turn of the key ... If it was a funnier moment i would have screamed "Its alive !!!! Its haaaliveeee!! ", Nope, i quietly drove home ...

To be Continued ...

Monday, January 17, 2005

There are things I know nothing of...
Is hell below and heaven above?
Is it better to lust than to love?
To be a rock or to roll?
To love a body or the soul?

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

verbal foreplay

(drama name="small talk" genre="boring")
(charactor name="manasan")
(charactor name="malavika")
(scene location="temple outside the entrace to the town" time="evening")
manasan: hey malavika, the sun is setting, lights are going away, and see things that we saw
all day are getting covered up so fast. (pause) life is so short malavika.
malavika: hey manasa, why do you tell me all this, as if i dont know that.
manasan: (pause)
malavika: hey manasa, dont bore me.
manasan: (pause)
malavika: why dont we just fuck, and let me go home.
manasan: ok, so no need for foreplay, ha
malavika: no more of that verbal foreplay of yours.

Saturday, January 01, 2005


proceed with cuts between guy and gal

guy : south
gal : north

guy : chubby
gal : slim

guy : hindu
gal : muslim

guy : grey
gal : wheatish

guy : oiled dark hai
gal : straightened chestnut hair

guy : thick lips
gal : thin rose lips

guy : eats rice sambar
gal : eats roti dal

guy : black powerful eyes
gal : brown eyes

and then they meet!

Months back, when i was a good worker

select * from ...

This is the way my day starts ...
and i end it with ...


in between, we go for breakfast break, lunch break, tea break, piss break, mouth look break, conference break, doubt clearing break (when ramnath screams in agony .. "nihaaaaaaa! the query is returning null!!!" ...) , water collection breaks (filling seethas water bottle from the distant dispenser-near the toilet!!! aaah bad architecture - much like the human body)

though Allen Mammen (comeon ! you dont know him? .. do i ?) .. says that all these breaks are to be mentioned in kintana (a time tracking tool), we dont because, we dont write about the extra effort we put in either . Everything is perfect in web technologies... You plan for 20 hours with 2 resources ... finish it off in an amazing 1 hour with 50% utilization of a resource .. voila! thanks to the OFFSHORE PROCESS MODEL designed by SOMEONE SITTING AT ONSITE and driven by an account manager, who cant find the windows key on his keyboard (Oh.. he stopped programming 10 years back!!).

in between ramnath again pops in and whispers "nihaaaa, the query did return 1 row, i didnt see it. he he he "

"I was jolted from my tiny nap with my (newly wedded) tl's snoring!!!"

i try to get myself out of the SCREEN by clicking on Google News (something genuinely legal ?) ..
Websense : This site is blocked due to unmentionable reasons
ha ha ha .. This gives me an oppurtunity to actually use my $%^#$skills after a loong (read it as current_date - date_of_employment) time ...

and when i am chewing google news ,i hear ramnaths footsteps !!!!
aah. .. "try to keep yourself low.. cross over to the next cabin ... now!.. rush to the toilet .. peace :).. stay here for a while"
(dont forget to switch off mobile).

S%#%%$ is complaining about something ... Thats something rare !, I lend my ear ...
"They selected that guy even after we rejected him twice !! I gave him a -1 for tech skills! and they are sending him onsite ?! This is heights!!!"

True, very true, POLITICS sucks !

after the 4'oclock tea (which is a must - freshers break :)), when i return to my 4x4 prison, i see k#$&% crying .. or is he laughing ? He highlights two lines in the email sent by the onsite coordinator

"the requirements have been delayed by 2 weeks, you can adjust the intermediate tollgates and deliverables,or in other words , you can do whatever with the Microsoft Project Plan, BUT THE END DATE WILL REMAIN THE SAME :), keep up the good work, with love... "

i respect the software industry . i respect the software moguls. i honestly believe that organizations like mine and the products like the one i develop are the real reason, people believe in God.