Thursday, July 29, 2004

To Err is Divine

" To Err is Divine,
To Repeat is Human
"

I dont invent words, I just misuse them

Strings - Scorpions - Santana

forever,
neo

Sunday, July 25, 2004

Abolish Me From This Blog !!!

Ever since i got my first salary , to a few weeks back , i was disoriented, hallucinated, mislead ... Put in better words ,i got myself into a destructive pattern ... But a few weeks back something magical happened ... I suddenly outgrew myself ... ofcourse its no drastic change on the outside .. but ofcourse, it something to do with " i have learnt to live with myself ! " ha !!..
I believe i am removing the "HELPLESSNESS" factor .. phew !
Prioritize on "Excercising" "Remove haught from the system" !

cut back to august 2003:
gradually i moved from one extreme to the other ... my idea was to be involved in every activity till i got bored , this way i could remove all my addictions and afflictions and be a saint.. Put in better words (bala's term) .. PRUDNAR .. Pious, religious , unsophisticated NAR.

the idea was fundamentally flawed and each affliction made me more weak, both physically and mentally. and the sad thing was , i couldnt prove myself that i had done anything OUT OF THE BOX ! it was all normal.

Then , i began to think that the reason to all pain, all misery , all sufferings is our FREE TIME, yeah, just because our life style is all so wretched that we just have to take care of a few things to live .. we dont care how food is produced, how clothes are made ,how houses are made .. how we protect ourselves bare handed ... just beacause we are fucking software professionals ...(fuck! it feels great to say FUCK after a long fucking time ! fuck again !!! fooooooooook )

yeah, its true that human civilization has advanced so far because we divided all our responsibilities .. Imagine Cave man days .. men hunt , kids play , women cook, fuck all night , save for future .. i mean that was cool , No fucking free time .. but look now, we got awfully a long free time ....if you dont have free time, then probably you are doing some work repeatedly all day long (TYPING / COUNTING / TALKING) ? .. the same work over and over again .. and then dash of to a BLACK SLEEP with no dreams and no IDEA of whether you want to wake up tommorow ?

if all of us do our own cultivation, cooking , washing , and everthing else .. there will be no fucking boredom, i think!! but then what will happen to the destitute and the poor and the weak .... ofcourse we gonna help them .. aint we ? ha ha ha ...

Friday, July 23, 2004

Fundamentally Flawed

Anita is a classic example of natural beauty ... no additives or preservatives ...
one hundred percent unaldulterated maiden of the wine yards ...
pink lips (no lipstick mind you ..), bright eyes , long hair spoilt by the
indian tradition of tying it into an unopenable knot ,a curl of hair over her face ...
slender , unquestionable build , and to top it all a smile that could make you float weightless
over the ninth cloud for atleast a couple of minutes ...
above all , she is happy with what she has .. without that Killer instinct of
competitiveness (aargh ? is that a word) , you usually associate with a 20 something software
engineer.
now shobin sits beside me, while i am typing this and asks "aaraade ee anita ?" ...
"colleague" .. i say ..
should i say that she is that feminine simplicity that rippled the memories
of my first infatuation ? nay , shobin wouldnt understand.
sometimes, you wish to be unrealistic , to dream of love as they show in the movies ,
with songs and all , just the good things about love , just beauty ...
we used to spoil such thoughts with disgusting questions like "does she dig her nose?" and so,
but , now i am back to square one .. just pure dreams .. aah beauty .. classic beauty..
all my dreams are turned rose now , the color of her churidar ... nothing else .. no work,
money , religion, after-effects , causal analysis, bugzilla, kintana , dowry, ... nope nothing
maybe its the "Duur" by strings that i am hearing right now, thats making me think like this ..
but i like it anyway :) and i am gonna dream ....

Monday, July 12, 2004

fight-club

Bala has started a fight club .
The first one to join was stimbi-dog.
Kesu went in for his first fight today.
i will join tommorow ..

The only rule : Dont stop until you can beat a man to death with your bare hands :)

Quote: Fight Club (1999)
"I ran. I ran until my muscles burned and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more."

Sunday, July 11, 2004

Q's

What if we didn't exist, you and I?
What if we couldn't question why?
What if we were the constructs of the eternal sleeping mind?
What if we were just shadows of the light, memoirs of the blind?
What if we were lost, running in little circles, searching for the end?
What if we were found, in the shadows, howling with the wind?
What if we were and never are?
What if we are close and yet too far?

Saturday, July 10, 2004

a little dream

life of people in the novel "the good terrorist" by doris lessing

to be a squatter in a large city. living illegally in a house whose latrine holes are concreted by government to prevent easy living for squatters. shitting in plastic buckets in the top floor. paying no rent to any body. taking bath in the urban trains' latrine. doing no work. other than being radical or slightly leftist or "being nothing - living the life to the fullest with drugs with ones eccentricities".

adaptated to suit me
to be a squatter in a large city. living illegally in a house whose latrine holes are concreted by government to prevent easy living for squatters. shitting in plastic buckets in the top floor. paying no rent to any body. taking bath in the urban trains' latrine. doing some work during day. other times spent by being social worker who is slightly leftist or "being nothing - living the life to the fullest with ones friends - ones passion - with ones eccentricities".